Twin Language? Not Really

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Have you ever thought that twins sometimes have their own secretive language?

When my twin sister and I was very young, my mother mentioned that we would always talk to each other in our own baby language. In addition, I notice that babies sometimes communicate in their own language, but what my mother said was different with twins is that they tend to posses a very strong interactive and verbal behavior.

For example, when my twin sister and I would make conversation as babies, my mother said that we tend to look very interactive. We would take turns talking to each other, asking questions, answering them, making jokes and laughing about it.

Unlike most baby language’s, the difference with my twin sister and I was that our little baby talk was in the Hawaiian language.

The Hawaiian language has always been an important part of our lives. My twin sisters first word was actually a Hawaiian word that she said to me. In a way, I feel that it was very interesting that my twin sister and I had our own language.

While we were growing up, sometimes, in uncomfortable environments and in front of strangers, my twin sister and I would choose to use the Hawaiian language. It was very humorous to me while I watched other people who was not at all familiar with the Hawaiian language look very confused.

One time in high school while picking up some gatorade from a local grocery store, my twin sister began speaking in Hawaiian and a woman came up to us and asked us what type of twin language are we speaking? We both looked at each other and felt so awkward.

This is just a lesson to some people who feel that twins always have their own language. Sometimes they are honestly just trying to blend in with everyone else.

I love you Kahealani

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A Lesson From Dad

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Have you ever gotten into a huge argument with one of your best friends and then five minutes later you automatically begin to get sad because you don’t want to fight with them?

Well, that’s the bond my twin sister and I share.

I can recall this one experience around the fourth grade that my twin sister and I will never forget. One day, after school, my sister and I were arguing all day and throwing things at each other.

Finally, my father stepped in and pulled us both near each other. He shaped our hands into fists and moved us closer into each others face and said, “you two want to fight, well go ahead!” At the moment, my dad looked very serious and it was probably one of the most awkward feelings I have ever felt.

As soon as we were in each others faces’, my twin and I began shedding all these tears. It was different when we were encouraged to physically hurt each other. It just felt very wrong, and not like us.

We began to feel stupid and embarrassed to even consider physically hurting one another. After that we both hugged each other and apologized.

This was a very good learning experience for my twin sister and I. When we think of that moment today, It always makes us giggle. At the time, I didn’t understand why my dad was encouraging us to fight each other, however, since then, I can honestly say that my twin sister and I have NEVER physically hurt each other.

In addition, my twin sister and I have a very difficult time holding grudges and extended arguments against each other. Through this experience in the fourth grade, my father really taught us both the value in arguments and the importance of forgiving each other.

I love you Kahealani

Advice For Twin Parents

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This blog topic was requested by another blogger who is interested to know what my parents did right while raising my twin sister and I.

Although my parents divorced while my twin sister and I was about six months old, one very significant thing my parents did a good job at, was setting their differences aside, and never putting us in the middle of their relationship and or arguments.

My parents worked very hard to get a long and provide only a positive relationship in front of my twin sister and I to show that we were not an issue or problem that led up to their divorce.

Aside from the divorce, my parents did an excellent job while raising us both in our individual personalities. Although my twin sister and I are very similar, our interests and hobbies differ. In addition, what our parents needed to do was understand that we are two separate people and treat us differently depending on our interests.

If I wanted to play basketball, my parents did a really good job at allowing me to do that while asking my twin sister what she was interested in, rather than just throwing her into basketball as well. So recognizing the different interests and characteristics of both my twin sister and I was something my parents did right.

Another thing my parents did right while raising us was making sure that my twin sister and I had a very strong and positive relationship. They wanted to make sure that no matter what my twin sister and I had each others back at all times.

Overall, the most important thing to keep in mind as a parent of a twin, as my mother would say, is to never let the twins feel like they are being put in the middle. As any child, you should never let them feel like this, however, for twins, they feel like they are a bigger impact because they’re two of them. And lastly, my mother mentioned that as a parent of twins individuality can make all the difference in raising them.

I will be posting more advice for parents of twins in the near future.

I Love you Kahealani

Two Is Better Than One

 

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I always wondered why my twin sister and I would always make friends in groups of two. Sometimes I noticed twins hanging out with their one individual friend, and they shared that one friend with each other.

However, as a twin, I feel that we always have each other as best friends. In addition, twins tend to make friends in a larger group or in my situation in two’s.

While thinking about my friendships growing up, I noticed that majority of the time my twin sister and I always made friends in a group.

But, it was different, because it wash;t like my twin sister picked out a friend and I picked out a friend and made us become a group of friends, we sort of noticed that friends that hung-out in pairs got along better with us.

For example, in high school, my twin sister and I became very close friends with these two twins who was not like us at all. We all possessed different value and characteristics, which was interesting. But, it felt so comfortable being friends with other twins or just a pair of individuals.

I also found it ironic when coming to college, because my twin sister and I became the best of friends with two individual girls who possessed the same ethnic group, the exact same name, and have birthdays a week a part and born in the same year.

In addition, I came to the conclusion that twins tend to create friendships in a group or by two’s because it seems further realistic and comfortable in pairs rather than just individual friendships.

I love you Kahealani

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(High School Friends “Twins” )

 

 

 

Us Twins and Our Significant Others

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When people are looking for their significant other and or soulmate they tend to say that they are looking for their opposite, their other half.

When my twin sister Billie and I would go through boyfriends we sometimes made jokes about how our boyfriends would call us their other half. The reason that it was so funny was that growing up as a twin, me and my sister always felt that we were each others “other half.” In addition, we would call our significant others our “other other half.”

Today, I have been with my boyfriend Kaipo for about 1 year and 3 months, and my sister Billie has been with her boyfriend Reyko for about 2 years and 3 months. It’s ironic that my sister and her boyfriend started dating on December 31, 2010, and exactly a year later my boyfriend Kaipo asked me out on the exact same day of 2012.

Although our boyfriends are not twins and are not anything a like, they posses characteristics and a personality similar to ourselves. The only difference is my personality is very much like my sisters boyfriend Reyko, and my twin sister’s personality is very much found in the characteristics of my boyfriend Kaipo.

My sister and I talked about this subject a few times and I started to realize that I was very much drawn to my boyfriend Kaipo not only because he was opposite of myself, but  because he was very much like my twin sister Billie.

In addition, I am pretty convinced that twins who date, tend to seek love in a partner who is very similar to their twin because it feels complete, safe, and right.

I love you Kahealani

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The Parent Trap….. More Like “The Teacher Trap” haha (A Twin Confession)

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Do you remember that 1998 movie staring Lindsay Lohan? The one that reunited two identical twin sisters at a summer camp where these girls started as enemies, and ended up becoming bestfriends and switching lives with one another?

Well, this movie was called “The PARENT trap” for a reason.

Being a twin has it’s challenges, but it also has its twists. Twins have the ability to switch places and pretend to be the other person.

Growing up, my twin sister and I would sometimes pretend to be the other person in front of family members and friends to trick them, but in a funny way. It didn’t occur to me that we could actually pull it off at school.

So here’s our confession: (And if you were a past teacher, and you’re reading this, we love you  🙂

In the second grade my twin sister and I decided to switch classes because I had a math quiz, and my sister Billie had to work outside in the school garden. I highly disliked math, and I still do, and my twin sister was a girly girl, she didn’t really enjoy the mud as much as I did.

We ended up pretending to be each other for the day, and even when we saw each other at lunch time, my sister had a smirk on her face and be were giggling from a distance.

No one had a clue, and to us, fooling our family members never worked, so when it finally worked on classmates and teachers, we felt like rebels!

I’m never going to forget this day, and all the other days that we performed the “teacher trap”. But due to possible conflicts, all other experiences will not be shared 🙂

I love you Kahealani

 

 

 

Double the fun, twice the confusion

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Ever got mistaken for someone else? Maybe because of your name or even the features of your face? Ever went through roll call in high school and had the same first name as a classmate and answered at the same time?

Now, imagine that awkward two seconds of your day when you are mistaken for someone else, is it funny? Is it interesting? Is it cool?

For most people, when they first encounter this situation it’s very unique, interesting, and sometimes, it’s funny. However, for Twins, it takes a lot of getting use to.

From my personal experiences, I’ve noticed people see us as some kind of game, and it’s fun for them to guess who is who. But for twins, it really does get old! Especially those who we are familiar with.

I remember when my parent’s would confuse us when we were younger; they use to feel terrible for the mix-up, because they understand how important it was to be acknowledged as our individual self.

It gets tiresome at times to remind people who we are, and why we aren’t the other person.

I remember this one particular time that my twin sister Billie’s partner in one of her College courses just walked up to me and began rambling about her group project. It wasn’t until maybe two minutes that she stopped and I was able to say “I’m sorry, but I’m not Billie, I’m her twin sister.”

Sometimes I am able to make a joke out of it and play it off like it’s not a big deal. But having this happen to me at least five times a week can get annoying. Even when my twin sister and I are involved in separate activities and are also in different classes, mix-ups always happen.

What I’ve learned is that being a twin can most certainly be double the fun, but it will always be twice the confusion for others.

I love you Kahealani

Shopping For 1

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Growing up with a twin sister with the same taste and style of clothes was both a blessing and a curse.

Sometimes when we would shop together in the same department store, we would show up at the dressing room with at least two identical clothing materials. Sometimes it was funny, while other times it was a battle.

When both of us really wanted a particular blouse or shirt identical to one another we sometimes fought over who should have the authority to buy it over the other. We fought over who we believed picked out the blouse first, or who’s budget is better to purchase the item of clothing.

While we were children our parents would dress us, so we didn’t really have any control over what we wore. When we got to high school we developed our type of trends in clothing that we enjoyed wearing. However, wearing the same exact outfit for the both of us at the time was a little embarrassing.

We already spent several years wearing the same outfits because of our parents, so we wanted to have the same style but still wear different outfits.

For a while we’ve struggled with who got to buy what blouse or pair of jeans. We just kind of took turns.

Now being in college, we noticed that if we really find a similar item of clothing attracting and we both want it, then we decided that one of us would just buy it and we would share wearing it. I know it sounds weird, but I could buy an outfit that would be enjoyable for both me and my twin sister, and she could do the same.

In addition, we both got what we wanted, no fights or battles, and we didn’t need to spend more money than we would have if we were just buying separate outfits.

We were just shopping for one!

I love you Kahealani

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Sharing The Podium On Graduation

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When people usually walk on the podium during a graduation ceremony, every individual has those split seconds of their individual academic achievements. For twins, it’s a quite the experience.

I’ve noticed that when twins are called during graduation it’s always further noticeable because of the last names. When someone hears Billie Hiraishi Magna Cum Laude, Becca Hiraishi Cum Laude, the comparison has already begun.

Graduation is a time to celebrate an individuals academic success. Every individual is judged by their individual performance and intelligence.

In high school, friends and classmates would always enjoy comparing each others report cards and seeing who got the highest grade on an exam, homework, and participation. For twins, it wasn’t that fun.

Being compared like I’ve mentioned a million times before was very a huge challenge. It seems like a further personal level of comparison then a playful level as with friends when comparing academic achievements. Report cards, transcripts, academic recognitions, club involvements etc. are all factors when twins are being compared during graduation season.

My sister and I always communicated well when uncomfortable situations would appear concerning our academic success. High school graduation is a highly significant time for most people in school. It’s a time to celebrate your individual academic achievements, but being a twin, we’ve noticed that were celebrating both academic achievements. Sometimes I would always wonder what it’s like to just be noticed for my own academic achievements, and not for two people.

In addition, what i’ve learned though the many special days and spotlights that I’ve shared in my lifetime as a twin is that sometimes being a twin gives you a brighter spotlight to shine!

This May, 2013, I will get a chance to share the podium once again with my beautiful twin sister as we graduate from College.

Would you rather shine alone in your spotlight on graduation? Or would you prefer a shared spotlight on this special day?

I love you Kahealani

Soccer, and its many comparisons

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Most sports allow you to be an individual player and show-off your individual skills in that specific sport. With all the competition and comparison of skills and technique, it was always somewhat weird being a twin and playing soccer.

My twin sister and I started playing soccer when we were four years old and from the beginning of our soccer careers our father was always our coach. Most times coaches are judging players and comparing players to others on the team, but my father knew how to coach his twins.

My father didn’t compare us to each others like most coaches did in the future, but he showed us our individual strengths and weaknesses, separately.

With a competitive sport like soccer, it was always a challenge to stand-out when someone else on the team had an identical face, body features, and even soccer skills.

Although we weren’t able to have our father as our coach all the time, other coaches didn’t quite understand how to coach twins. Just with school and academic achievements, twins are always compared to each other.

Sometimes being compared to a bunch of your friends isn’t that bad, but when your put up against the one person you care about most your individual skills never seems like its good enough.

In high school as well as college, soccer got further serious allowing our individual strengths to be compared to everyone in the high school league and then placed at certain levels.

Most of these soccer achievements were always placed in newspapers, local magazine articles, as long as on the internet. When one twins name got in there as a sport achievement and the other didn’t it caused some issues and bittersweet feelings.

But, what i’ve learned through soccer and being a twin is that competition and comparison is always going to be either an issue or a challenge; how you manage these challenges will determine the future success of your individual self.

I love you Kahealani