Twin Language? Not Really

Have you ever thought that twins sometimes have their own secretive language?

When my twin sister and I was very young, my mother mentioned that we would always talk to each other in our own baby language. In addition, I notice that babies sometimes communicate in their own language, but what my mother said was different with twins is that they tend to posses a very strong interactive and verbal behavior.

For example, when my twin sister and I would make conversation as babies, my mother said that we tend to look very interactive. We would take turns talking to each other, asking questions, answering them, making jokes and laughing about it.

Unlike most baby language’s, the difference with my twin sister and I was that our little baby talk was in the Hawaiian language.

The Hawaiian language has always been an important part of our lives. My twin sisters first word was actually a Hawaiian word that she said to me. In a way, I feel that it was very interesting that my twin sister and I had our own language.

While we were growing up, sometimes, in uncomfortable environments and in front of strangers, my twin sister and I would choose to use the Hawaiian language. It was very humorous to me while I watched other people who was not at all familiar with the Hawaiian language look very confused.

One time in high school while picking up some gatorade from a local grocery store, my twin sister began speaking in Hawaiian and a woman came up to us and asked us what type of twin language are we speaking? We both looked at each other and felt so awkward.

This is just a lesson to some people who feel that twins always have their own language. Sometimes they are honestly just trying to blend in with everyone else.

I love you Kahealani

A Lesson From Dad

Have you ever gotten into a huge argument with one of your best friends and then five minutes later you automatically begin to get sad because you don’t want to fight with them?

Well, that’s the bond my twin sister and I share.

I can recall this one experience around the fourth grade that my twin sister and I will never forget. One day, after school, my sister and I were arguing all day and throwing things at each other.

Finally, my father stepped in and pulled us both near each other. He shaped our hands into fists and moved us closer into each others face and said, “you two want to fight, well go ahead!” At the moment, my dad looked very serious and it was probably one of the most awkward feelings I have ever felt.

As soon as we were in each others faces’, my twin and I began shedding all these tears. It was different when we were encouraged to physically hurt each other. It just felt very wrong, and not like us.

We began to feel stupid and embarrassed to even consider physically hurting one another. After that we both hugged each other and apologized.

This was a very good learning experience for my twin sister and I. When we think of that moment today, It always makes us giggle. At the time, I didn’t understand why my dad was encouraging us to fight each other, however, since then, I can honestly say that my twin sister and I have NEVER physically hurt each other.

In addition, my twin sister and I have a very difficult time holding grudges and extended arguments against each other. Through this experience in the fourth grade, my father really taught us both the value in arguments and the importance of forgiving each other.

I love you Kahealani

Advice For Twin Parents

This blog topic was requested by another blogger who is interested to know what my parents did right while raising my twin sister and I.

Although my parents divorced while my twin sister and I was about six months old, one very significant thing my parents did a good job at, was setting their differences aside, and never putting us in the middle of their relationship and or arguments.

My parents worked very hard to get a long and provide only a positive relationship in front of my twin sister and I to show that we were not an issue or problem that led up to their divorce.

Aside from the divorce, my parents did an excellent job while raising us both in our individual personalities. Although my twin sister and I are very similar, our interests and hobbies differ. In addition, what our parents needed to do was understand that we are two separate people and treat us differently depending on our interests.

If I wanted to play basketball, my parents did a really good job at allowing me to do that while asking my twin sister what she was interested in, rather than just throwing her into basketball as well. So recognizing the different interests and characteristics of both my twin sister and I was something my parents did right.

Another thing my parents did right while raising us was making sure that my twin sister and I had a very strong and positive relationship. They wanted to make sure that no matter what my twin sister and I had each others back at all times.

Overall, the most important thing to keep in mind as a parent of a twin, as my mother would say, is to never let the twins feel like they are being put in the middle. As any child, you should never let them feel like this, however, for twins, they feel like they are a bigger impact because they’re two of them. And lastly, my mother mentioned that as a parent of twins individuality can make all the difference in raising them.

I will be posting more advice for parents of twins in the near future.

I Love you Kahealani

Us Twins and Our Significant Others

When people are looking for their significant other and or soulmate they tend to say that they are looking for their opposite, their other half.

When my twin sister Billie and I would go through boyfriends we sometimes made jokes about how our boyfriends would call us their other half. The reason that it was so funny was that growing up as a twin, me and my sister always felt that we were each others “other half.” In addition, we would call our significant others our “other other half.”

Today, I have been with my boyfriend Kaipo for about 1 year and 3 months, and my sister Billie has been with her boyfriend Reyko for about 2 years and 3 months. It’s ironic that my sister and her boyfriend started dating on December 31, 2010, and exactly a year later my boyfriend Kaipo asked me out on the exact same day of 2012.

Although our boyfriends are not twins and are not anything a like, they posses characteristics and a personality similar to ourselves. The only difference is my personality is very much like my sisters boyfriend Reyko, and my twin sister’s personality is very much found in the characteristics of my boyfriend Kaipo.

My sister and I talked about this subject a few times and I started to realize that I was very much drawn to my boyfriend Kaipo not only because he was opposite of myself, but  because he was very much like my twin sister Billie.

In addition, I am pretty convinced that twins who date, tend to seek love in a partner who is very similar to their twin because it feels complete, safe, and right.

I love you Kahealani

 

The Parent Trap….. More Like “The Teacher Trap” haha (A Twin Confession)

     

 

Do you remember that 1998 movie staring Lindsay Lohan? The one that reunited two identical twin sisters at a summer camp where these girls started as enemies, and ended up becoming bestfriends and switching lives with one another?

Well, this movie was called “The PARENT trap” for a reason.

Being a twin has it’s challenges, but it also has its twists. Twins have the ability to switch places and pretend to be the other person.

Growing up, my twin sister and I would sometimes pretend to be the other person in front of family members and friends to trick them, but in a funny way. It didn’t occur to me that we could actually pull it off at school.

So here’s our confession: (And if you were a past teacher, and you’re reading this, we love you  🙂

In the second grade my twin sister and I decided to switch classes because I had a math quiz, and my sister Billie had to work outside in the school garden. I highly disliked math, and I still do, and my twin sister was a girly girl, she didn’t really enjoy the mud as much as I did.

We ended up pretending to be each other for the day, and even when we saw each other at lunch time, my sister had a smirk on her face and be were giggling from a distance.

No one had a clue, and to us, fooling our family members never worked, so when it finally worked on classmates and teachers, we felt like rebels!

I’m never going to forget this day, and all the other days that we performed the “teacher trap”. But due to possible conflicts, all other experiences will not be shared 🙂

I love you Kahealani

 

 

 

Double the fun, twice the confusion

 

Ever got mistaken for someone else? Maybe because of your name or even the features of your face? Ever went through roll call in high school and had the same first name as a classmate and answered at the same time?

Now, imagine that awkward two seconds of your day when you are mistaken for someone else, is it funny? Is it interesting? Is it cool?

For most people, when they first encounter this situation it’s very unique, interesting, and sometimes, it’s funny. However, for Twins, it takes a lot of getting use to.

From my personal experiences, I’ve noticed people see us as some kind of game, and it’s fun for them to guess who is who. But for twins, it really does get old! Especially those who we are familiar with.

I remember when my parent’s would confuse us when we were younger; they use to feel terrible for the mix-up, because they understand how important it was to be acknowledged as our individual self.

It gets tiresome at times to remind people who we are, and why we aren’t the other person.

I remember this one particular time that my twin sister Billie’s partner in one of her College courses just walked up to me and began rambling about her group project. It wasn’t until maybe two minutes that she stopped and I was able to say “I’m sorry, but I’m not Billie, I’m her twin sister.”

Sometimes I am able to make a joke out of it and play it off like it’s not a big deal. But having this happen to me at least five times a week can get annoying. Even when my twin sister and I are involved in separate activities and are also in different classes, mix-ups always happen.

What I’ve learned is that being a twin can most certainly be double the fun, but it will always be twice the confusion for others.

I love you Kahealani

Sharing The Podium On Graduation

 

When people usually walk on the podium during a graduation ceremony, every individual has those split seconds of their individual academic achievements. For twins, it’s a quite the experience.

I’ve noticed that when twins are called during graduation it’s always further noticeable because of the last names. When someone hears Billie Hiraishi Magna Cum Laude, Becca Hiraishi Cum Laude, the comparison has already begun.

Graduation is a time to celebrate an individuals academic success. Every individual is judged by their individual performance and intelligence.

In high school, friends and classmates would always enjoy comparing each others report cards and seeing who got the highest grade on an exam, homework, and participation. For twins, it wasn’t that fun.

Being compared like I’ve mentioned a million times before was very a huge challenge. It seems like a further personal level of comparison then a playful level as with friends when comparing academic achievements. Report cards, transcripts, academic recognitions, club involvements etc. are all factors when twins are being compared during graduation season.

My sister and I always communicated well when uncomfortable situations would appear concerning our academic success. High school graduation is a highly significant time for most people in school. It’s a time to celebrate your individual academic achievements, but being a twin, we’ve noticed that were celebrating both academic achievements. Sometimes I would always wonder what it’s like to just be noticed for my own academic achievements, and not for two people.

In addition, what i’ve learned though the many special days and spotlights that I’ve shared in my lifetime as a twin is that sometimes being a twin gives you a brighter spotlight to shine!

This May, 2013, I will get a chance to share the podium once again with my beautiful twin sister as we graduate from College.

Would you rather shine alone in your spotlight on graduation? Or would you prefer a shared spotlight on this special day?

I love you Kahealani

Soccer, and its many comparisons

Most sports allow you to be an individual player and show-off your individual skills in that specific sport. With all the competition and comparison of skills and technique, it was always somewhat weird being a twin and playing soccer.

My twin sister and I started playing soccer when we were four years old and from the beginning of our soccer careers our father was always our coach. Most times coaches are judging players and comparing players to others on the team, but my father knew how to coach his twins.

My father didn’t compare us to each others like most coaches did in the future, but he showed us our individual strengths and weaknesses, separately.

With a competitive sport like soccer, it was always a challenge to stand-out when someone else on the team had an identical face, body features, and even soccer skills.

Although we weren’t able to have our father as our coach all the time, other coaches didn’t quite understand how to coach twins. Just with school and academic achievements, twins are always compared to each other.

Sometimes being compared to a bunch of your friends isn’t that bad, but when your put up against the one person you care about most your individual skills never seems like its good enough.

In high school as well as college, soccer got further serious allowing our individual strengths to be compared to everyone in the high school league and then placed at certain levels.

Most of these soccer achievements were always placed in newspapers, local magazine articles, as long as on the internet. When one twins name got in there as a sport achievement and the other didn’t it caused some issues and bittersweet feelings.

But, what i’ve learned through soccer and being a twin is that competition and comparison is always going to be either an issue or a challenge; how you manage these challenges will determine the future success of your individual self.

I love you Kahealani

It’s A Twin Thing

Why do twins choose to dress alike?

Thats simple, we love confusing the hell out of people!

Whenever there’s a costume party or an event that allows you to dress up, my twin sister and I find it fun to dress in outfits looking like twins, even when we already are twins.

When we were younger, our parents dressed us. Most times we had the same outfit, they were just different colors. I feel that most times they did it as a way to remember who was Billie and who was Becca.

When we were teenagers we were going through a phase of trying to be an individual, and straying away from looking alike. What I noticed is that sometimes we had planned out outfits the night before and we still ended up wearing similar outfits the next day without even knowing.

One time, a couple summer’s ago, my twin sister and I were headed to the beach with our best friends at the time, who were also twins. My twin sister Billie and I were heading to the beach separately, and I needed to go to the store to pick up a new bathing suite with my best friend Bre, and we were going to meet our sisters at the beach.

Ironic as it may seem, I picked out the exact same colors, bottom and top that my twin sister Billie had already previously planned. We got to the beach wearing the exact same thing!

In addition, sometimes twins plan to wear the same clothes because its fun, while other times its just sorta happens; it’s a twin thing!

I love you Kahealani

Stuck Like Glue

When my twin sister and I were younger we could never fall asleep without holding each other’s hands.

My mother mentioned one time when we were around two years old my twin sister Billie couldn’t stop crying because of a cold she was fighting. At the time, my older sister was at my father’s house, while my mother took my twin sister and I for the weekend.

My mother mentioned that she tried feeding my sister to make her feel better and cooling her down, but nothing seemed to work. Shortly after, I decided to leave my bed and cuddle up by her and hold her hand; within seconds my twin sister Billie stopped crying and fell right to sleep.

Research shows that there are several benefits to twins who sleep next to each other. “Multiples who are co-bedded seem to sleep better, gain weight better, have fewer episodes of apnea and bradycardia, and keep each other warm.” (Bird, 2012)

From personal experience, I find this research to be very true. Even until this day, I sleep better when I’m in the same room as my twin sister.

Throughout our childhood, my twin sister and I always shared rooms. Most times we had our separate beds, however, it wasn’t unusual to find both of us asleep in one bed the next morning.

Throughout high school we were able to get our separate rooms, but we often decided to have mini sleepovers. It just didn’t feel right or comfortable sleeping in a different room.

Sometimes after high school friends and classmates separate and go on their own journey, however, my twin sister and I decided to go to the same University in Belmont, California where we roomed together.

We are currently seniors attending our final semester of college here in California. Although we may not need to hold each other’s hands like we use to, we still share a room at 21 years old. I guess you can say that were just stuck like glue.

I love you Kahealani